accidentalpaint: Linda Hogan to Hulk: 'Be a Big Boy' and Apologize

Linda Hogan has waited patiently to tell her side of the story of her 2009 divorce from wrestling icon Hulk Hogan, and she pulls no punches in setting the record straight about the split in the memoir 'Wrestling the Hulk,' telling PopEater about her motives for writing it and the truth about her new engagement to 22-year-old "soul mate," Charley Hill. Linda, who has kept her ex's surname of Bollea, says it comes down to his alleged cheating and the collapse of trust that came with it. "He's the one who has to live with himself and look in the mirror knowing what he's done, destroyed a family," she tells us, adding that she's forgiven him even though he won't cop to his mistakes.

"I have moved on and forgiven him even though he's never apologized to me or the kids," she told us. "We go through the lawyers. I couldn't care less if I don't talk to him but my kids suffer. It's kind of a cowardly way out. I hope some day he can grow up and be a big boy and talk to his ex-wife for his kids sake."

Did you write this book in response to your husband's memoir?
No, my book had nothing to do with Terry's book. I had a journal I kept for many years and during the divorce it was really difficult to voice my opinion, not that I needed to, but my divorce was so public, it was like my husband was using every media campaign to get his hands on to try and out me and make me look like the bad guy and I really didn't have a voice in that and I thought with my son having got in that horrific accident and going to jail and the divorce, it was just not the time to air my dirty laundry and make things worse. I didn't want to be pouring fuel on the fire then but I thought at some point I will be able to talk and tell my accounting of what I think happened in my marriage which is the truth. it's been a long time coming and I hope that with millions of women in the world going through the same situation as I went through, hopefully when they read the book they'll be able to feel a little bit better knowing that there's some help out there, learn something from this and I'm hoping to help women move forward from sticky situations.

Were you frustrated at being portrayed as the bad guy?
Right, at this point nobody heard my side, he went out there and made it look like I was screwing some 19 year old, my kid's high school friend and it was nothing like that, trying to make it like maybe I was the one possibly doing the cheating. It killed me but I had good lawyers, everything is going through the court system, I don't want to look like a blabbermouth, the truth will come out. At that point I didn't really care what the public thought of me. I was concerned about my kids who were already being embarrassed enough by the public divorce. My job first was to be a good mom, make sure I got through this divorce without too much trouble.

Tell me about those last few years of the marriage.
I was doing all the gluing and mending and keeping the family together. Making everyone look good, handling the show and the kids careers, handling the animals, the house, the TV show. I was like the camel, they just loaded me up. It just got to the point where I had a feeling my husband was having an affair, I knew it in my heart of hearts, I just didn't have proof. When a husband is cheating he doesn't act the same, I certainly knew that, I knew there was a problem.

Do you wish you had had the guts to leave earlier?
I think that would be my message to women, just quit making excuses for everything. Look at the situation, maybe write things down because sometimes they become clearer when you see them on a piece of paper. I just think like stop messing around, Life is short, nobody is guaranteed 90 years here and at some point, you know your kids are going to be ok and when you find out your husband is doing that to you, you really don't have faith in anything anymore, it's gone. I said to myself, 'I cried my last tear over him, he's not worth it. I'm not going to feel sorry for myself, I feel sorry for him. He's the one who has to live with himself and look in the mirror knowing what he's done, destroyed a family.

Things went south when he had an affair, the first that I knew of, ten years into the marriage and that pretty much changed the course of everything. It changed me.

Do you talk at all?
I don't speak to him. I'm able to forgive and move on. I have moved on and forgiven him even though he's never apologized to me or the kids. We go through the lawyers. I couldn't care less if I don't talk to him but my kids suffer. He only wants to communicate through lawyers which leads me to the conclusion that he doesn't want to have to account for any past actions. It's kind of a cowardly way out. I hope some day he can grow up and be a big boy and talk to his ex-wife for his kids sake.

How's Charley?
We've been dating for three years. He's a soul mate. I really needed somebody at that time in my life, I was alone and needed someone so much. He became a great friend and then it became physical and emotional and everything else. He's just a super, awesome person. He's proposed to me and I've accepted. It's not like it's a cut and concrete things. It's just something we would like to do. I love being with someone younger, I'm kind of a young spirit and he's kind of an old soul so it works out.

He is about 30 years younger and one of your son's friends, though.
My husband made everyone think he was my son's high school friend. It wasn't like that at all. He attended the same school in a different year. My kids did not know him and I didn't meet Charley until almost ten months after I'd filed for divorce. My husband was already living with another woman way before that.

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The Hogan Family

Charley Hill (L) and Linda Hogan attend the party celebrating the release of "Sexy Slang's Bedroom Challenges" on October 9, 2010 in West Hollywood, California. Sexy Slang's Bedroom Challenges Book Tour Party Los Angeles, CA United States October 9, 2010 Photo by Mark Sullivan/WireImage.com To license this image (61994369), contact WireImage.com

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RIDGEWOOD, NJ - JUNE 28: Linda Hogan promotes her book "Wrestling The Hulk: My Life Against The Ropes" at the Bookends Bookstore on June 28, 2011 in Ridgewood, New Jersey. (Photo by Michael N. Todaro/Getty Images)

The Hogan Family

©BAUER-GRIFFIN.COM Hulk Hogan and son Nick Bollea visit the E3 video game convention in downtown Los Angeles to promote Hulk's new game "Hulk Hogan's Main Event" for the Xbox Kinect. While taking in the sights, Hulk took a pit stop to chat up a couple of "booth babes" who were showing off a Ferrari. NON-EXCLUSIVE June 7, 2011 Job: 110607B1 Los Angeles, California www.bauergriffin.com www.bauergriffinonline.com

The Hogan Family